Don't ever wear a tube top to feed the geese.

If you clicked on this entry just because you thought you'd hear about the correlation between tube tops and geese, I'm sorry. It's just a quote from Phineas & Ferb that I can't help but love. But I'm pretty sure you can figure out why you wouldn't wear a tube top to feed geese. I'm hoping.

Oy. This post has been 2 days in the making. I don't know what is up with me, but something is going on with this 32-year old body. Like someone convinced her that she's actually 80 and that Geritol is desirable. Seriously, I'm about to break out into a Garth Brooks song about how my knees are creaking and my eyesight ain't what it used to be. Except my Alzheimer's prevents me from remembering the words.

I was so so blessed on Saturday night to be able to meet my sweet bloggy real-life friend Linny. She and her beautiful daughter Emma were in town for the Revolve tour here locally, so I basically stalked Linn and told her I had to see her. I've just admired her from the second I first found her blog in January (has it really only been that long?) and I've wanted to meet her ever since. She really is even more amazing than I thought. Just a true, Godly woman that loves and treasures the Lord and all the amazing gifts He's given her (like her ten beautiful children!). We had a blast, and hung out at the mall for a while while Emma & her friend shopped. Okay, we shopped too, but mostly talked. ;) It was such a great time and I am so thankful I can call Linny my friend.

On Sunday the fam took the trek down to meet my parents at a pumpkin patch that we've visited a couple times before. Except this time we were much more aware of the two hour drive and the thousands of people there to join us. For some reason, that combined with the 85 degree heat just didn't make for the best of days. The kids had fun though and that's all that mattered. We ate our picnic lunch, then let the kids go in the petting zoo, the straw maze (um, yeah. they couldn't even make it a corn maze. it was a maze of hay bales. bales that you could see over and that kind of defeats the point of a maze, or is it just me?) and then on the hayride. We ended the day by letting the kids pick out pumpkins that weigh the amount of a small child and were on our way. It was a good day but I don't think we'll go again. There are other places much closer that will charge us $2 to pet a stinky goat that tries to eat your shoelaces.

Big Hunk is off on Mondays so we headed down to Disneyland. I have missed it oh-so-much and I was so excited to go. Perhaps even more than the kids, but what can I say? These wrinkles are just for show and I'm really a kid at heart. A kid that complains about the $14 parking (no, I'm not kidding).

I won't go into all the details (you're welcome) but I will recap it like this: arrived. found parking spot less than 2 miles from the escalator (miracle). got to disneyland. realize we left our parking pass in our car (which we need to buy our annual parking pass). big hunk takes the tram back to our car, I head inside with the grams and gramps and the littlest ankle biter. before we even get in the park, I start seeing spots- a sure sign that a migraine is about to hit me hard. find first-aid once we step foot (or two) in the park and then track down some migraine medicine, all while not being able to see a darn thing. migraine proceeds to hit full force within 15 minutes, and this has become an even longer recap than I expected. i will speed it up. went on rides. ate. left. better?

We really had a lot of fun and I love hanging out with my parents. Big Hunk was a little grouchy (the happiest place on earth does that to him) but I have to admit, it was a tad crowded. Not his favorite combination. I can't wait to take the kids again though and I'm thinking of going back in a few days with my boychild to have a little date night. Fun stuff.

I will leave with you a few photos that will hopefully drown out the bad memories of my rambling.

linny & i. i was laughing so darn hard as we were taking these pictures that I don't look normal at all. which might be a good thing.

but isn't linny gorgeous?

our cute little farmer family at a little place we like to call "Nate's Butt Farm"
(if I even get hits from google searches for "butt farms" I'm going to lose it)

i love Ikey's face here. she was laughing hysterically because the sheep just stuck his whole face in her food bag, apparently too busy to be bothered with a little thing called 'waiting'

i just loved this pig, he was so sweet and mellow (maybe because he was fat and couldn't move??). i've always wanted a pig and he just looked so cool.

swooning over the baby bunny (can you even tell it's a rabbit? well it is)

love this pic!!

i'm going to have to do another post of the pics of disneyland. this took entirely too much time and too much room.

thanks for checking them out!

Blah-tastic

I was working on an entry today, and even mentioned how it had taken me two days to write it. Well, make that three because it is now 12:15am and this girl ain't 31 anymore so I need to get to bed.

I haven't been feeling well for a few days so I have had no drive to do a single thing (Google says I have cancer by the way). Feeling yucky along with cleaning up after my team of Olympic gold-medalist human tornadoes has left my creative juices parched.

Off to bed I go, it's much too late.

Singing that Pointer Sister song

I am so darn thrilled, I get to meet Linny tonight!

When I heard on Thursday that she was on her way out to my neck of the woods (from Colorado!) I told her I HAD to see her. And I'm sure I only partially came across as a stalker. So we were trying to coordinate a time that would work since she's only out here for a couple days, and it seems that tonight will be perfect- I can't wait! Big Hunk will be off work so I don't have to track down a babysitter (which would have been impossible today, being all of them have a volleyball game today), and I can take my time.

I just adore Linny and I feel so blessed that I get to meet her!

Testing

Yay, it worked! Testing out using my cell to post pics and stuff, since it's always attached to me anyway.

Remembering.

I was unaware when I woke up this morning that it was Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. But, sadly, because I have so many friends that have experienced this loss, I quickly saw all the cute thumbnails on Facebook to let me know. I wish with all my heart that not a single one of them had had to post that today to remember their losses- that they had never lost those babies at all and that today would just be another normal, cool October day.

In November of 2005, I was blissfully pregnant. I hadn't been that way since the beginning though. I found out I was expecting our third baby the month before, and I will admit there was no joy at first. We had our perfect family- one boy, one girl. I had stopped nursing my youngest just one month prior and I was so thrilled to have my body back to lose that baby weight that was plaguing me and I had no intentions of giving it up again.

So when I found out I was pregnant again, it took several weeks to embrace the positive pregnancy test and daydream about the day I would hold my sweet newborn in my arms while cuddling my older two. I admit I was completely selfish. It was all about me and I knew it was wrong. But it didn't stop me. I did finally get there though, and I started to enjoy the changes my body was going through (okay, some not so much) and long for that day I could watch my daughter become a big sister. Our perfect family was about to become more perfect.

Right before Thanksgiving, we spent a day and night in the mountains with my sister-in-law and enjoyed ourselves. We all had a blast and suspected nothing. However on Sunday after we returned home, I had the tiniest speck of blood when I used the restroom. I let my fears get the best of me and researched every possible thing I could find about miscarrying. But then it never happened again. My fears were unfounded and I realized it was nothing. Until Tuesday, the day after my husband's birthday. Nothing could prepare me for what I was about to experience. My husband was letting me sleep in (I was sick), but I ran downstairs really quick to get a cough drop. As I walked back up the stairs, I felt a gush and I knew. I knew my world was falling apart and there was nothing I could do. Strangely, I just went back to bed and cried. I told my husband what was happening, but I didn't rush off to the doctor. I just pleaded with God and cried. I spent the rest of the day wondering when all of the horrible things I had read about would happen, but realized in the evening I was just impatient. I remember sitting on the bed with my kids in incredible pain right before they were to go to sleep, and I was watching TV. During a commercial I switched the channel to some music awards show and Rob Thomas had just come on, singing "Ever the Same". I completely broke down. That song has ever since been my song and will almost always guarantee a few tears from this woman.

That night, I had to take myself to the ER because my bleeding had become so extreme, and Big Hunk had to stay home with our sleeping children. I endured 3 hours of tests and insensitive medical staff to finally just go home and deal with the emotional and physical aspects of my loss. Though I dealt with the physical burdens of losing my baby for over 3 weeks, it was nothing compared to the emotional torment and heartache I experienced. It truly rocked my world like nothing else. During those days I was so thankful to God- for my wonderful husband that would do anything to take away my pain in a second; a very special friend that admitted she didn't always know the right words to say, but was there for me with a listening ear and a shoulder; and a loving mom that could never understand the pain her daughter was going through, but cried with her.

I made it through.

I learned so much during those days. I learned that it wasn't all about me. I hated myself because I hadn't appreciated the gift God had given me. I got through to the other side and realized that God knew all along that my baby would be with him in Heaven long before I ever held it. I learned that I really did want to have another baby, and that nothing could fill that yearning in my heart that my loss had created.


I got pregnant again, twice, and lost my babies in March and August 2008.

Each one has taught me something and strengthened my heart just a little. They have helped me to a be a better friend to those that have to endure it. They have helped me appreciate God's plan for my life more than my own. They've helped me hold on to my kids tighter and see them for the amazing gifts they are.

I would never wish the pain my losses have caused me on anyone. Yet I know that so very many women endure the same pain everyday and it breaks my heart. If you have endured this type of loss, please leave a comment so I can pray for you today and remember your baby with you. Our babies may not be held in our arms this side of Heaven, but their legacy can live on now.

Beautiful day

We had a {really} awesome day today. Maybe it was just the peacefulness of spending a day lounging around with no concrete plans, but it was the best day we’ve had in a while.

We started off our day watching the 9am Angel game, and cheering them on for the next 3 ½ hours. (Um yeah, by the way… they won!) Seriously one of the best games I’ve watched in a long time. So after I was done cheering them on (loudly) and acting all giddy-like, my parents came over a little while later. My darn car hasn’t started in a week (the first real problem we’ve had since we bought it 6 years ago) so since my parents have AAA, they came over so we could tow it down to Big Hunk’s work. It’s super convenient that he works at an automotive shop, but silly that we had to have it towed the 3 miles there. Hopefully it’s nothing major, but it doesn’t sound like it to this trained ear. Ahem. No comments please.

While my parents were over we took the kids in the spa, and just hung out and talked. Well, most of us did. Big Hunk was enjoying his spot on the couch watching football. ;) It was just a really nice, relaxing day. I can’t remember the last time we’ve had one of those! We’re always so jam-packed with activities and to-do lists that we forget to just enjoy each other.

Yesterday the Goodyear Blimp flew over our house. The kids were SO excited! It was amazing how close it was. Turns out it flew over again today, but not quite as close and we were so thankful we had that chance yesterday. Not something you see (from your doorstep) everyday!







So dear friends, on a final note, I have a question. And I would really really love your input, because this just has me baffled.

Have you ever had someone that wants out of your life and swears they want nothing to do you, but then practically stalks you afterward? It's just so bizarre to me, really... reading my blog on a daily basis, checking my Twitter account... So what do you think keeps people coming back for the very thing they swear they hate? Do you ever do that in your life? (okay not so much on the stalking, because if you do, I probably don't want to know.) ;-) But I know some of you might have really awesome insights into this kind of thing, and I would love to hear them.

On that note, have a great Monday! <3

Sweet niblets

I sooo did not want to let so much time pass in between blogging. We went a good month (or two?) without internet, so when I finally did get it a few weeks ago, it kinda messed up my schedule. I have to say, I got a lot more done without it! ;)

We're doing well, just trying to get over the sickies in our house. Mikey had food poisoning almost 2 weeks ago, and that was a beauty. Erg. We think (well we're pretty darn certain) he got it when we went out to dinner and he had pancakes & sausage. That was a Monday, and the next night we went to an Angels game (free tickets, yay!). Now if you know my boy, you know the last thing he would ever want is to miss a baseball game. So when we spent half the night in the restroom and he wanted to leave early, we knew he felt like crud. Sure enough, he passed out in the car and then puked all over it 5 miles from our house. Oh sweet niblets indeed. I'll spare the details but he wasn't back to himself for about a week. Just in time to get a cold 2 days later, my sweet boy. He's missed 2 of his baseball games in a row, and that is the highest form of torture for this kid. :(

Sadly the cold didn't pass over Big Hunk this time and he's been absolutely miserable. Working on his feet for 11 hours a day doesn't help either, and I'm praying he can recover tomorrow while he's off. The Angels playoff game is at 9am so I'm picturing a nice relaxing morning in bed, cuddling with my 3 loves. <3

School is going really well, though I have to say we're hitting that bump in the road where the novelty of the year has certainly worn off. We've missed out on quite a few days because of Mikey being sick too, so it seems like it's dragging. Though we had started our year early, those missed days have pushed us right on schedule. So, gotta make up a lot of time if we want to take extra time off at Christmas! The kids are doing great though, and I love teaching them. Ikey, my kindergartner, is learning to read and I have to say this has got to be one of my favorite ages. It's so fun! I love how much they learn over the year- it's truly a year of milestones and watching them grow up. Mikey is doing great and is excelling in spelling & math. Many times now I've had to skip ahead in certain lessons because they're just a little boring for him. He definitely has his daddy's love for math. But I think science is his favorite (and Mom's least). He {loves} doing our science experiments and seeing what's going to happen. Mom hates the mess.

And lastly, a few photos. Over the summer we visited my good friend Eileen (from high school!) down in San Diego and we took the kids on a couple jaunts. First we hit a botanical garden that was just gorgeous- and the kids had a blast. After that, she took us to this amazing meditation garden (sensing a theme?) that was immaculate and so beautiful. Not to mention it had the most amazing view of the ocean I think I'd ever seen. So here are some pics from our visit...

The 4 kiddos, hammin' it up for the mamarazzi.

Ikey absolutely {adored} Eileen's daughter Lily. She doesn't have a lil' sister or a girl cousin to play with, so I'm pretty sure she wanted to take Lily home

I'll link to the rest of the pics from my Flickr account shortly. Baby steps, you see.